How to Charm Thy Father, A Users Guide
1. Go with him to Be$t Buy. This step alone buys you major points.
2. Upon entering the main isle, wiggle to be put down.
3. As soon as your feet hit the ground, make a beeline at top speed for the large screen TV display area disregarding all obstacles and other customers in the area.
4. Upon reaching the big screen TV area, stop and point at the biggest screen and laugh. Then,
do a little dance that involves bending your knees, waving your arms and shaking your behind. Laugh some more and clap.
5. Turn to find your daddy standing behind you. Point to the biggest screen and say "Oooooo".
6. Attempt to climb into one of the huge chairs parked in front of the big screen TV's.
7. After several minutes, give up on the climbing and just stand in front of the biggest of the big screen TVs with your mouth open.
8. Repeat dance from step 4 roughly every 30 seconds.
9. Ignore your parents laughing.
10. When removed physically from the Big Screen TV Area, use every opportunity to escape to go back and stare at the TVs.
The only way William could have possibly made John any happier is if he had somehow managed to produce cookies and milk in front of the big screens. I have a feeling I'm in for some long trips to Be$t Buy in the future.
2. Upon entering the main isle, wiggle to be put down.
3. As soon as your feet hit the ground, make a beeline at top speed for the large screen TV display area disregarding all obstacles and other customers in the area.
4. Upon reaching the big screen TV area, stop and point at the biggest screen and laugh. Then,
do a little dance that involves bending your knees, waving your arms and shaking your behind. Laugh some more and clap.
5. Turn to find your daddy standing behind you. Point to the biggest screen and say "Oooooo".
6. Attempt to climb into one of the huge chairs parked in front of the big screen TV's.
7. After several minutes, give up on the climbing and just stand in front of the biggest of the big screen TVs with your mouth open.
8. Repeat dance from step 4 roughly every 30 seconds.
9. Ignore your parents laughing.
10. When removed physically from the Big Screen TV Area, use every opportunity to escape to go back and stare at the TVs.
The only way William could have possibly made John any happier is if he had somehow managed to produce cookies and milk in front of the big screens. I have a feeling I'm in for some long trips to Be$t Buy in the future.
No comments:
Post a Comment